Jack is our hero. Jack is a middle school student with Asperger’s Syndrome. He has always known he was different from many of the students in his class but he never disclosed his diagnosis with any of them.  He stood in front of his class last year and explained to them that he has Asperger’s Syndrome.  He was honest about his challenges and difficulties and took great pride in all he has accomplished.  I nod my cap to such a courageous young adult.  We should all learn from Jack and take a moment to appreciate the strengths and challenges we all have.

A Transcript of Jack’s Presentation:

Hi. I’m Jack Lebersfeld. I have been in school with most of you since the 2nd grade. I am, for the most part just like you, but in some ways I am different. I have Asperger’s syndrome, also known as autism spectrum disorder or AS for short. AS is not a disease. You can’t catch it. It is not something that can be cured. It is a condition that I have and will always have. It means my brain is a little different than yours. I see the world in a slightly different way than you do. This difference has given me some great strengths, but also some big challenges. There are many characteristics of AS and I am going to share with you some of mine. I am doing this today so that I may become more understandable to you and maybe you can be more understandable to me.

The most common difficulties for people with AS is with social situations. Like having conversations or having a play date. I do not always act appropriately, because I am often unsure of the right way to behave. I want to learn to be more social. It is very hard for me to have conversations about things I am not interested in. It’s not that I don’t care about you, but I am much more comfortable talking about things that are meaningful to me. Please alert me if I am not being appropriate. Also, it is sometimes uncomfortable for me to look someone in the eye. It doesn’t mean I am not paying attention to you if I’m not looking straight at you.

I am very literal and many times it is hard for me to understand things that may have more than one meaning, like saying “He died laughing.” I may think you really meant someone died! It would be helpful to me if you could explain what you mean in another way if I seem not to understand you. Please do not tell me to do things that I shouldn’t because I cannot always tell whether it is the right thing to do. I assume you are being honest and helpful. If you tell me to lay on the floor, I may do it because I think you are telling me something important that I don’t know and I listen to you.

I am also very impulsive. That means I may move around a lot and can blurt things out. I often do not have enough control to filter the things I say, or I can be very direct. I would never intend to hurt anyone’s feelings. If I say something that seems hurtful please explain that to me. If I say something like “I didn’t imagine your house to be small,” all I mean is that in my head I pictured your house to be bigger. I don’t really care the size of anyone’s house.

Sometimes I react to a situation more strongly than you may. Sometimes I get more upset than I should. I know I should be able to control myself more, but sometimes I just can’t.

I’m also forgetful. My mind moves very quickly and sometimes I can’t keep up with it. Sometimes I get lost in my own world and a friendly touch on the shoulder can bring me back.

I am very disorganized. Things like keeping my papers orderly or remembering to hand in homework come easily to most of you. For me it is hard. If you notice I have forgotten something, please tell me.

My brain is not wired like yours so I don’t process information like you do. Because of that, I know that sometimes I may seem different than you. Please know that I still have feelings. I am telling you this because I want to be accepted and included but can sometimes use some help. I am hoping you will not tease me or make fun of me for being different but rather help me to learn to be more social. I want very much to have friends, but don’t always know how to go about that. I have to work very hard to try to fit in.

I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I am not sad that I have Asperger’s. We are all different from one another. I do have some challenges, but I have some great strengths too. I have a really good memory and I’m very creative.

They say Bill Gates has it and Albert Einstein had it, and Marshall Mathers also known as Eminem may have it, so I am in good company. Hopefully one day I can do something that will also change the world.

Thank you for taking the time to listen to me. I hope we can be friends.

If you have a child with learning differences and are looking for services for them, please contact the My Learning Springboard team and we can help you create a customized learning solutions that can accomodate their needs.

Conferences provide one of the best opportunities during the school year for parents and teachers to share important information.  At times perspectives will differ but the goal of the conference will be the same:  for the child to make academic progress, to feel valued and to be successful.  Research has shown that when parents and teachers work together everyone benefits. The suggestions below will ensure that both parents and teachers arrive at the destination – your child’s successful academic achievement – with a clear and shared understanding of the journey ahead.

Getting Prepared

• Be Proactive – If possible meet and get to know the teacher before the conference.  This is important because if concerns and problems arise, you have already established a positive and trusting relationship with your child’s teacher
• Assemble and Review Relevant Materials – gather appropriate materials to help prepare for the conference this may include current and past report cards, test scores, and student work samples.  If there are any relevant medical concerns or information, be prepared to share that information as well. If you have not done so already, you will want to consider starting a file or notebook so this material is always in one place, in chronological order.
• Avoid Surprises – Conferences aren’t the place for them.  As a parent, you want to be continually up-to-date, knowledgeable and involved in your child’s academic and/or social emotional progress.  If you’re initiating the conference, share the purpose of the conference with the teacher when you schedule the meeting.  Don’t wait until you sit down at the table to share your concerns. Teachers don’t like surprises either.
• Take Notes – It’s important to document conversations and recommendations, particularly if a student is struggling and concerns and strategies are being discussed.  Depending on the situation, you will want to send a follow-up summary of notes to be sure everyone has the same understanding and to facilitate follow through.

Conferencing

• At the start, restate the purpose for the conference and ask the teacher to provide an update on your child’s progress.
• During the update, listen for specific data regarding your child’s progress in relation to grade level standards and benchmarks in academic subject areas.
• Seek clarification or further explanation on anything you are unsure about. This is important because educational terminology is not familiar to everyone.
• Ask the teacher to share work samples if they have not been provided.  They will help to deepen your understanding about the information being shared.
• Offer to be involved with your child’s learning outside of school.  Ask for specific suggestions, materials, and/or strategies to enrich, extend or reinforce the concepts and skills learned during the school day.
• If there are learning challenges or your child is struggling in a specific area, work closely with the classroom teacher to develop an intervention plan that includes a home component.  The plan must identify specific and measurable goals to be accomplished within a set period of time.  Remember to check in with the teacher regularly regarding the status of the intervention plan and your child’s progress.

In the End

By the end of the conference you should know:

• Your child’s strengths
• Goals and steps to facilitate improvement
• How and when follow-up will occur
• What you will be doing with your child outside of school to support these goals

Whether the conference is initiated by the parent or by the teacher, mutual respect and a positive tone are essential in ensuring a successful meeting and ongoing relationship.  It is limiting to think that parent-teacher conferences must occur within the brick and mortar walls of the school building.  Be creative.  Technology provides a wide range of options such as phone, Skype, Face Time and Google Chat.  The use of technology allows all stakeholders to be actively involved in their child’s education.  The use of these tips provides a road map to alleviate a bumpy ride during parent-teacher conferences.  The journey is worth it.

By Laurie Gross and Amy Shapiro
My Learning Springboard, Inc.